Publication Date: 2nd Dec 2021
Written By: Monolith.
Image Work: Douglas Mangum.

BIOGRAPHY - page 1

Dorian and Maureen Green gave birth to Doreen Allene Green in Los Angeles, California, with Doreen also sharing Canadian citizenship on her mother’s side. She also had a tail. Maureen had a very complicated pregnancy, you see, which included factors like a radioactive tree, a squirrel bite, cosmic rays striking her in the forest and an experimental nut serum. Some even thought she was a mutant at first, but that’s the sort of the thing that gets you sued by FOX, so Doctor Ditray did some tests and determined “Doreen is medically and legally distinct from a mutant, and I can never take this back.” What was clear was that Doreen had the powers of a squirrel and a girl. [Unbeatable Squirrel Girl (2nd series) #1]

Growing up, Doreen was a bright and happy girl, although she didn’t always understand why her parents wanted her to hide her tail around company. When she was ten years old, Doreen’s family moved to a new city and she had trouble making new friends at school. While venting aloud in her room, Doreen was consoled by a squirrel named Monkey Joe, who was passing by her window. Both were immediately surprised to realize they could understand each other, and Doreen realized her squirrel traits included the ability to communicate with squirrels as well. It was Monkey Joe who convinced Doreen that her powers could make her a hero after she saved him from a Corgi. [Unbeatable Squirrel Girl (2nd series) #16]

Doreen took Monkey Joe’s advice to heart. She wanted to prove that her abilities made her special and not a freak, so she crafted a costumed identity for herself as Squirrel Girl. Doreen hoped to meet her hero Iron Man and become his crime-fighting partner. She found him testing a new collision avoidance radar in the woods outside Stark Enterprises, and leapt onto his back to demonstrate her skills. Using her grappling abilities and tail, Squirrel Girl was able to temporarily ground the surprised Avenger. Doreen explained her powers and plan to the bemused Iron Man, but he wasn’t interested in taking on a partner. She was so disappointed that Doreen almost forgot to mention that she had already jumped Doctor Doom in the woods earlier, thinking he was Iron Man.

Before he could even process this information, Iron Man was taken down by Doom when he revealed himself from the shadows. Doctor Doom had followed Squirrel Girl after their brief encounter, and decided to take advantage of the situation to capture Iron Man. He brought Squirrel Girl along in his hovering Doomship to punish her for the impunity of attacking his royal person. Doom imprisoned Iron Man, using power sink energy bonds and activated a death trap to slowly crush him to death. Squirrel Girl he left unrestrained and (presumably) helpless to die in the same collapsing room.

With Iron Man helpless thanks to the bonds, Squirrel Girl worked alone to find a way to escape their fate. She discovered a small vent that opened from the Doomship to the outside. Flying low to avoid radar, the Doomship was close enough to the tree tops for Squirrel Girl to summon an army of squirrels onto the vessel. Their extra weight threw off Doom’s navigation, and several squirrels made their way inside the ship to begin sabotaging the delicate innards. Monkey Joe and the squirrels damaged the power supply, allowing Iron Man to break free. Iron Man and Squirrel Girl had time to leisurely make their way to the bridge, where Doctor Doom was stymied by a solid mass of “wretched rodents” tearing at his person. Doom was forced to flee from his own ship and dive into a nearby body of water to rid himself of the squirrels. Doom escaped, and Iron Man had to congratulate Squirrel Girl for giving Doom one of the most ignominious defeats of his career. Shellhead still wasn’t looking for a partner, but he was impressed by Doreen. He told the teenager to finish school, keep practicing and look him up after she graduated. [Marvel Super-Heroes (2nd series) #8]

Doreen stayed committed to her career as Squirrel Girl, improving her combat strategies and personal training. She studied detective work and other disciplines she thought would be useful for a hero. By the time she was eighteen, Squirrel Girl had an impressive win rate against a number of dangerous foes, including the Mandarin, Giganto, Terrax, M.O.D.O.K. and even Thanos. She moved to New York and made Central Park her stalking grounds, surrounded by squirrels at her beck and call. One night, Squirrel Girl and Monkey Joe interrupted the mugging of two heroes from the Midwest, Doorman and Flatman. On a recruitment drive, they offered her membership in the Great Lakes Avengers. Doreen accepted, but only if Monkey Joe received full membership rights as well.

Unfortunately, membership in the GLA exposed Doreen to the darker side of super-heroics. The team’s other new recruit Grasshopper was killed mere seconds after accepting the invitation. As the team explored a plot by Maelstrom and his minions, Monkey Joe was left behind on monitor duty. The poor squirrel was killed by Leather Boy, the team’s stalker and former member who was furious he had been replaced on the roster by a mere squirrel. Doreen was beside herself with grief, and only the reminder that Maelstrom destroying the universe would also kill all the squirrels got her to stand up. Squirrel Girl brought an army of squirrels to confront Maelstrom and Batroc’s Brigade, but the villain’s device was still activated. As Mister Immortal confronted Maelstrom directly, many squirrels died in vain being sucked into the vortex. Squirrel Girl saved one small, brave rodent from the vortex before it closed, and chose to adopt the young squirrel as her new partner, Tippy-Toe. [G.L.A. #2-4]

Squirrel Girl settled in to her new life in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The Great Lakes Avengers were good friends and partners in crime-fighting, even though they had little super-crime to fight in the Midwest. As a Secret Santa, the wealthy Big Bertha gave Doreen her own personal helicopter, the Squirrel-A-Gig! [GLX-Mas Special #1] Also, thanks to being in Wisconsin, Squirrel Girl was nearby when her favorite teen hero Speedball was giving a show at the University of Madison. Doreen had always had a crush on Speedball, even before he and the New Warriors turned the team into a popular reality TV show. Squirrel Girl stepped in to defend Speedball at the stage show from his old nemesis, the Bug-Eyed Voice, and even got a kiss from her idol as thanks. [I Heart Marvel: Masked Intentions #1]

The team from Milwaukee had trouble hanging on to a particular group name, thanks to various trademark complaints, eventually settling on the Great Lakes Champions. [Thing (2nd series) #8] They soon found an even better option when the 50-States Initiative was launched, planning a super-team for every state in the union. Squirrel Girl and her pals quickly signed up under the Superhuman Registration Act, receiving official recognition as the Great Lakes Initiative. The impulsive bounty hunter Deadpool wanted to make a quick buck by arresting anti-registration vigilantes, and attacked the GLI before checking their registration status. He had bounced the GLA around before (back when they were the Lightning Rods), but had never faced the power of Squirrel Girl. Doreen was repulsed by Deadpool and quickly slashed him to ribbons before turning him over to the proper authorities, who explained that the GLI were fully registered. [Cable / Deadpool #30]

Oddly enough, Deadpool and the GLI ended up joining forces soon afterwards against the forces of A.I.M. Once the science-terrorists were defeated, the Great Lakes Initiative offered Deadpool a position as reserve member for their team. Squirrel Girl was focused on her own problems, however, once she learned her crush Speedball had become the gloomy, self-harming, anti-hero known as Penance. Doreen tried to reason with Penance, but he was too wrapped up in punishing himself to listen. Squirrel Girl next “borrowed” the time machine from her cowed arch-nemesis Doctor Doom to confront Speedball before he became Penance and prevent his downfall. As a quirk, however, Squirrel Girl found herself in the year 2099 with a divergent version of Speedball left adrift in time after stopping an invasion from the future (Hey kids, comics!). Doreen was reunited with a version of Robbie she could relate to, but Mr. Immortal of the era showed up and encouraged her to return home. Deadpool had become a freeloader at GLI headquarters, and only Squirrel Girl was skilled enough to evict that evil, evil naked man. [Deadpool / GLI - Summer Fun Spectacular #1]

As time passed, Squirrel Girl found the GLI were ceding her more and more autonomy fighting threats and villains. Squirrel Girl and Tippy-Toe defeated Fin Fang Foom (and Baron Mordo and Korvac and Ego the Living Planet), while the GLI stayed behind and played cards, fearing they would only get in her way. Doreen decided the team would never live up to their potential so long as she was there hogging the spotlight. She decided to quit Milwaukee and give her friends time to shine. [Age of Heroes #3] Squirrel Girl returned home to New York City and the squirrels of Central Park she had come to love so much. [I Am An Avenger #1]

One of several Avengers teams had moved into the old Avengers Mansion. Led by Luke Cage and his wife Jessica Jones, they needed a nanny available to watch over their daughter Danielle when the team was in the field. Squirrel Girl was one of many applicants for the position, but her good nature and capableness quickly won over the Cage-Joneses. [New Avengers (2nd series) #7] Privately, Doreen admitted to herself she hoped this job would be a gateway to full Avengers membership in the future. Still, she was attending classes at ESU and needed a job to support her education. And, in only a short span of time, Squirrel Girl found herself deeply committed to protecting Danielle from anything that might threaten her.

Squirrel Girl’s innate fighting skills were on full display when she sparred with Wolverine at Avengers Mansion. The two of them shared a history that neither one was particularly willing to disclose, but Jessica Jones was interested to see Doreen in action if she was going to be protecting her daughter. Doreen’s wild, frenetic style overcame Wolverine’s composure, knocking him to the mat. When he chided her on turning her back on him before the fight was finished, Squirrel Girl shot back that he shouldn’t have turned his back on the Central Park woods. A hundred squirrels were waiting in the wings to make her point for her.

The first real test of her job came when the Red Skull invaded Manhattan with the forces of the Serpent and her Nazi war-droids. Squirrel Girl left school during the invasion, her thoughts immediately turning to Danielle’s safety. She fought through the stormtroopers and other threats before reaching Avengers Mansion, taking responsibility for Danielle so that Luke and Jessica could take the fight to the streets. Avengers Mansion went on lockdown mode, but it still came under fire from the Red Skull’s robots. Fortunately, Daredevil arrived and helped to hold off the invaders before getting Doreen and Danielle down into the mansion’s underground bunker. [New Avengers (2nd series) #15-16]

Jessica Jones came to recognize the danger her baby lived under once Norman Osborn threatened her child before escaping custody. As two different Avengers teams raced to hunt him down while protesters assembled daily outside the mansion, Jessica decided it was simply not a safe environment for her daughter. She and Doreen removed Danielle from the mansion and took her to a place of safety. [New Avengers (2nd series) #19-21] After talking it over with Luke, they decided they could not remain full-time Avengers and full-time parents all at once. Jessica and Luke stepped down as Avengers to live a private life of their own. Doreen came with them and continued to serve as Danielle’s nanny for some time. [New Avengers (2nd series) #31-34]